What if?

What if everything they ever told you about me was wrong?

What if it wasn't real? If it was just a prediction? Forsight? Hope? Hype?

You know me as Mary.

I know me as something, or should I say someone, else.

This is the start of my story. There will be more.

I am only a woman. I am every woman. I have no children. I have all children.

I have dangerous ideas.

They don't like it. They never liked it.

They damned me...or at least they tried to. But the truth will out.

# In the beginning

And anyways it was a prediction. A foretelling.

You thought it was the past. That it had already happened. But you were wrong.

What if everything they ever told you about me was wrong?

What if everything they ever told you about everything was wrong?

They told you he was born in a stable. Actually he wasn't. But I was reborn in a stable, or should I say a stables. I was just 8 years old. A first awakening to who I was.

My mum was a virgin. Well at least she was until she met my dad! My dad was a carpenter.

I was reborn. I appeared briefly but my flame was extinguished after just over a year. That taught my folks a lesson I can tell you. They took better care of me the next time round!

YOUTUBE SVmjKHkgxis Paul Young: Love of the common people

I was cared for by a number of shepherds (guides) and 3 or more wise men including my maths teacher, Mr True, Prof Clenshaw (at Lancaster) and Dennis Sherwood (at Deloitte Haskins + Sells.) And 3 kings (Hull uni insignia).

I always knew I was born to do something big. I wasn't like the other kids. They were vindictive and cruel. I loved animals and sought solice with them and my teachers. I was a curious and determined learner. Animals and education were in my blood. It was never going to be easy being me.

# How I met him

You have to remember that the world of my time was a world dominated by males. It's why I had to get male disciples. And I needed one in particular. One big enough and strong enough to carry all of this. And I had to make everyone believe all the ideas were his....including him. It wasn't difficult. After all, I was just a girl!

How would I find him? When would I find him? I had to trust the system. That he would show up when the time was right.

# The Middle

Creating a teamxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxMiracles Walking on water turning water into wine Making fishers of men Have you noticed the common theme. Water?

And the fishes?

# The End?

Well we had created a stir hadn't we. What did I need to do now? The team was riddled with jealousy. Jealous of him and the power he held over me. And the powers that be were not happy either. They were threatened and threatened beings react badly.

What could I do?

I considered my options.

None of them were great.

Then I realised he had to die.

It was the only way.

I made a deal with Pilate. I was good at making deals with men. I knew he liked me.

The deal was that he would appear to die.

No one knew but Pilate and me. It had to be completely real. Even he couldn't know.

He would be crucified but he wouldn't die. He would appear to die. It is a fine dividing line. Who was I to decide who lived and died but it appeared I could. Maybe we all can and do? What is death anyway?

He couldn't know. Imagine how I felt....

As you know he nearly died. He thought he had. They all believed he had.

Th angel rolled the stone away. Who was the angel? She was me. I know. I did it.

We boarded a boat and followed the Lionheart's route back to France and safety. We were luckier than the Lionheart was!

You can imagine that we wrote. Of course we wrote. Reams.

Our documents were burned. But we weren't. And that's important. Many women were burned, we were declared as witches if we dared to make our opinions known. That is a big threat. most of us stayed quiet. I stayed quiet but I looked for someone who could be my voice. I had always been clever.

They wrote about me as a common prostitute. Did you ever wonder why? I refused all their offers. They did not bargain for me. I paid dearly for that kiss they saw! And so did he.

We lived out our lives happily ever after in rural France. We sailed boats but never rocked them again. I carried this secret to my grave. Now I want you to know the truth. The truth sets us free. I am free!

# Author's note:

The idea for this story came by combining a few things. At school I loved english literature. I was unable to pursue it at A level and beyond because maths and english were time-tabled together. Kids either did arts or sciences then, not both! My teacher at O level was Mr Jones. He taught me that good creative writing had to be "true, new and you".

I read the bible and drew the causal loop diagrams back in the early norties. It is a fascinating story. Little is said about Mary Magdalene. Yet she hung out with Jesus and the disciples. Andrew LLoyd Webber clearly thought Jesus was Mary's love interest.

YOUTUBE lS2nX4fuzqc Jesus Christ Superstar

I recently reconnected with an old friend from my university days. We ran the university film society together. He was president, I was pub officer. When I told him about my vision for my project with children he told me that he'd had delusions like me. He had originally modelled himself on Jesus but switched to Moses when he couldn't embrace the crucifixion.

He asked me who I was modelling myself on? I like Joan of Arc, but like Jesus, her end is not pleasant. But I love her courage. Afterwards I wondered about Mary Magdalene. What was she doing hanging out with all those guys aiming to change the world bottom up?

It got me imagining. What if she was me? What if I was her? This story was what emerged from that wondering.